Let Me Entertain You and We’ll Have a Real Good Time, Oh Yeah

 

 

As Chief and Only High Priestess of the Church of Heughanology, it is part of my duties, to explore basics of the lifestyle (not a religion), in greater depth.  One of the most vexing realities of our dogma is Starz Tease Expertise.   In the Language of Heughanology, this term was defined as follows: 

 

Tease Expertise: The art of revealing almost all of an area on Sam’s body, without actually showing much of anything.  This can be very difficult during high winds and rainstorms.  Starz is particularly talented in Tease Expertise.

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This is not a new technique.   It is a time tested, well known tactic, to keep someone or something interested (as in the dangling carrot) in someone or something without giving away the whole garden.

 

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Who has not looked at this picture 1,000 times and thought, “If Only the black part of the picture could be 6 inches lower” and/or “Sam, jump up and down twice. Please!” and/or   “We need more light” It’s hot, but frustrating.  Starz Tease Expertise.

This one is a favorite in which Sam looks as if he is saying, “Am I really going to expose myself like this?” and then goes for it, but only so much.  Even Cait is dipping her head to get a little better angle on the view.  Can you imagine how many times they had to practice this to get the right amount of tease factor?  Too little…too much?  Starz Tease Expertise.

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Meme courtesy of @SirenSassenach

 

Sam is not alone with having this problem.  Notice Cait’s bewbs (how could we not?)

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First of all we need to commend Sam for keeping his eyes on her eyes.  He may have used his peripheral vision for the first 6 episodes of the series, but in this shot, he is trying to be a gentleman, truly.  Now Norma D is a woman’s woman, but even I had the urge to push those puppies inside her dress!   I wonder if she had a person just to make sure the nips were not showing there.  Starz Tease Expertise.

How did Cait not breathe a sigh of relief when he got to the last lace on that bustier?  How did she not ask him to scratch her back?  Great acting!

Our problem is the biggest tease of all –Droughtlander!  Starz has extended the tease beyond all limits of endurance.   We only have so many pictures in which to cull physical information about Himself.  We have closely examined every scene, every nuance, i.e. “Did ya no see the strumpet at the wedding?”

Now we are a bunch of dangling carrots.  Starz Tease Expertise.

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We need the outtakes more than one time a month (on the 4th).  I haven’t had the  “curse”  for some time, but it sounds strangely reminiscent.     I encourage revolt.   Deluge Starz with requests for more images and outtakes.  We are sick of entertaining ourselves!  I’ve resorted to writing this stupid blog!

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Listen Starz, we are fed up!  And after Thanksgiving,  our followers feel like this:

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19 thoughts on “Let Me Entertain You and We’ll Have a Real Good Time, Oh Yeah

  1. Nobody does it better MS, Norma D. I always love when he gives his pearl necklace to his wife. I did not know these was another meaning. 😳 Outlander is so educational!

    Love ya my little Strumpet!

    Lady Astara

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  2. Did you see the results we got from Starz? Even though it is coincidental, I am pleased we had some small part in the decision. Outlander Offerings is a great idea. I wrote to ask them to extend this through Easter or April 4, whichever comes first. Not sure of outcome yet. BTW, I got some strappy sandals to go with my Chief and Only High Priestess mantle. Must get it to the cleaners before my close up! Fondly, Norma D.

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  3. New pair of pumps are always nice, preferably stiletto:) I can’t wait till April arrives 》more studies of Sam’s bodily phenomenon in store;)

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    1. Dear Riza, I am happy you found a place where those who like and respect Sam Heughan can come to have a laugh or just find kindred souls. As COHP, I have tried to create a comprehensive study of this phenomena. Check out all of the different parts to be studied. I have an appointment to buy new shoes for my walk in the close up for Mr. DeMille. Fondly, Norma D.

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  4. please tell me where I can find the older outtakes of outlander that you mentioned ??? This blog is hilarious. I love the word strumpet. It is now incorporated in my vocabulary.

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    1. There aren’t any out takes that have been made available. That’s why I am asking Starz to fork them over for the membership. Anyway, I am happy we were able to meet a need in you for acceptance and love! I must run now, hairdresser at the door. Have to get ready for my close up. Norma D

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    1. I am pleased you are feeling fulfilled. It is heartwarming to find those who understand our attachment to all that is Sam. I wish I could spend ,ore time, but my turban maker is knocking at the front door and I need some new ones. Fondly, Norma D

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    1. I am pleased to know you appreciate my work. As Chief and Only High Priestess, I have had certain priveledged views of Sam, that might not be available to others. However, I am here to speak on behalf of all Heughanology followers! Full Monty or bust! Fondly, Norma D

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    1. Thank you for your kind words. It is true followers Ike yourself who will put the Starz mucky mucks at attention! Must go to a seance, to bring Bill Holden back for my salute to Mr. De Mille party. Fondly, Norma D

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    1. I try to limit slaying for the Virgin sacrifice (necessary in order to get to the home of Planet Heughan ) . BTW, know any virgins- male or female? We are a little short for the next sacrifice. Thank you, truly, for your encouragement and support. New gown for my close up just delivered. Gotta run! Fondly, Norma D

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